#3 in our series: The Four Agreements for Musicians
Today’s focus is another biggie: Don’t Make Assumptions.
This is an agreement that’s simple in theory but sneaky (and extremely challenging) in practice, especially in music. Why? Because in music, assumptions are able to sneak into nearly everything we do . . . rehearsals; recording sessions; collaborations; even how we interpret feedback from fans, bandmates, critics, and online commenters. They can come into play whether you’re in a band, managing a band, mixing a band’s album––you name it. Assumptions can be silent saboteurs that, due to our own unaddressed fears, we unknowingly allow to exist.
Don Miguel Ruiz writes:
“We make assumptions because we don’t have the courage to ask questions.”
As musicians, we’re working in environments full of ego, emotion, deadlines, varied social dynamics, and often little-to-no clear, direct communication. That’s a recipe for assumption overload. We assume someone doesn’t like our song. We assume that missed rehearsal was out of disrespect. We assume our bandmate’s silence = dissatisfaction with our idea.
And those assumptions? They derail collaboration, hijack focus, and slow down progress. Worse yet, they can make us all together quit on an otherwise terrific idea, project, or even career.
As difficult as it may be, exploring how to avoid (or, more realistically, minimize) assumptions can improve your musical relationships, your creative output, and your career trajectory. It can help to keep your musical momentum flowing.
Here are some scenarios that we can put this to use:
In the Studio: Assume Nothing
Have you ever sent a track off for mixing and later received back something wildly different than expected?
Or sent me a song to record remote drum tracks on and gotten back drum tones and grooves far removed from what you were shooting for?
Or had someone walk in with a half-finished song idea, saying: “you guys get what I mean, right?” and then the whole session stalls out of confusion and mismatched expectations?
Assumptions can slow things down and create frustration for all involved.
Possible solutions?
- PROVIDE more clarification. Send along some reference tracks of songs that fit the vibe that you’re going for. Share some notes of approaches that you might like to try (as well as some that you already know you don’t want).
2. ASK for more clarification. Get a better idea of the vision from the songwriter before diving in. “Can you describe the mood or feeling we’re aiming for here?” and “What’s the intended audience/venue/platform/etc.?”
Assuming that everyone is on the same page is a fast track to wasted time and disappointment upon playback. Better questions = better sessions.
In Rehearsal: Clarify Everything
You’ve probably experienced this: someone in the band keeps flubbing a section. Everyone gets tense. Someone assumes they didn’t practice or just don’t care.
Reality? Maybe they’re unsure of the chart or struggling with a fingering in this section of the tune, and are too embarrassed about it to speak up. Or they’re sick. Or stressed.
We don’t know unless we ask.
Possible solutions?
- Normalize asking for clarity during rehearsals. Normalize offering it without judgment. You’ll all avoid resentments before they develop.
2. Build in a Questions & Clarity moment while working on each song at every rehearsal. “Everyone feel solid on the form?” . . . “Are there any parts that anybody wants to tighten up?” . . . “Cool if we run just the ending a couple more times?”
With Listeners: Stop Guessing
Assuming what your audience wants can water down your creativity. One of the biggest creative traps is assuming what will “work” for listeners. Chasing trends, copying what’s hot, or over-polishing in fear of criticism can crush your originality.
You assume people won’t like the raw, earthy version of that vocal, so you bury it under layers of fluff audio effects and doubled, tripled, quadrupled vocal takes. You edit out a weird chord change because you assume it’s “too out there” for people, or ditch that super original drum part because it isn’t “Pop enough.”
But more often than not, your most honest (even “imperfect”) work is the one that’s going to cut through and resonate.
Possible solutions?
- Make the version you love. Be an artist. Take risks. Don’t assume that you know what they (whoever the hell “they” are) want.
2. Test it. Make two versions. Share it first with people you trust. Or with everyone! A band dropping two versions of the same tune? How unique and rad is that?! Then see what really lands with your audience. Pay attention to real feedback after the fact rather than the assumptions in your head. Maybe you were right. Maybe you weren’t.
Create, share, learn. Rinse and repeat.
I am sure that (whether on tour, or dealing with online interactions, or amidst songwriting collaborations, and on and on and on) you can think of a multitude of other scenarios that assumptions come into play in your life––musically and elsewhere.
No matter the circumstance, assumptions often tend to be fiction that we believe to be fact. They are usually just unverified beliefs we’ve accepted as truth.
In music, they cause miscommunication between bandmates, unnecessary self-doubt, missed opportunities for growth and creativity, and more. I don’t know about you, but I feel that ALL of these already exist way too much the way it is. The last thing we need is to be creating more of any of the above.
Let’s stop waste energy on assumptions and setting up our own invisible roadblocks, shall we? Let’s stop with the fictional narratives and being in our heads instead of in the music.
Is something unclear? Clear it up. Have doubts? Ask questions.
Don’t let guesswork derail your greatness. Clarity is a creative superpower. Use it.
Happy music making–
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